I was very young and as it would turn out, some might say very stupid, when my sister and I were invited to Palm Springs to meet up with a man who was one of Elvis Presley's dearest friends. We'd met Chad at the screening of a Hollywood movie, directed by friend, Michael Pressman, titled, The Great Texas Dynamite Chase.
Chad was taken with Jennie's beauty, as well as mine. He seemed to enjoy the fact that we were twins. As this self-proclaimed entrepreneur was looking both of us up and down, he offered, "Terrie and Jennie, if you're ever in Palm Springs and Elvis is there, I'll arrange an introduction."
Who wouldn't want to meet Elvis? The biggest entertainer in the universe. A self-made mega-star who was born January 8th, 1935 in Tupelo, Mississippi, Elvis started out as an usher in a movie theater and conquered the world music scene by selling over six hundred million records. And the man could act! He starred in thirty-three movies that included: Blue Hawaii, Love Me Tender, Jail House Rock, Viva Las Vegas, Roustabout, Girls! Girls! Girls! And of course, Double Trouble.
Elvis loved the ladies and was romantically linked with such actresses as: Cybil Shepherd, Ann-Margret, Natalie Wood, Connie Stevens and Nancy Sinatra--all after his divorce from Prescilla Presley, of course.
"We've always dreamed of meeting Elvis. Is he in Palm Springs now?" we asked.
Chad paused for a moment and then said, "Why, yes! Yes he is. Elvis will be in Palm Springs until Friday!"
So, the next day--always up for an adventure--we drove off to Palm Springs. We planned to star gaze, relax, write and look up this close friend of Elvis Presley.
Chad's business card featured the name of a Swiss restaurant along with his name. We couldn't figure out if Chad was the manager or the owner of this Swiss eatery.
When we arrived in Palm Springs we checked into the Spa Hotel, took out our twin, matching turquoise-velvet string bikini bathing suits and called down to the front desk to find out where the Jacuzzi was located. We then dialed the Swiss Hut Haus Restaurant. The voice that answered was familiar--it was Chad! He had an unmistakable Memphis twang when he spoke.
"Hello, Chad?"
"Yes. Who is this?"
"It's Jennie and Terrie, the twins you met at the screening of, The Great Texas Dynamite Chase in Hollywood, remember?"
"Oh yes! The twins!" Chad seemed excited. "Please, come down to my restaurant and be my guests for dinner. Where are you staying?"
"We're at the Spa Hotel."
"Good. Seven o'clock?"
"Fine. We'll see you at The Swiss Hut Haus, at 7:00 p.m."
Within fifteen minutes, just as we were about to head down to the Jacuzzi, there was a knock at the door of our hotel room.
"Who is it?"
"It's me, Chad!"
We opened the door to a stranger and did a double take. Last night Chad looked so normal. Today, we gazed upon a character right out of central casting. He could have been an "extra" for the movie, The Sound of Music. Chad wore black patent leather shoes, white knee socks, leather lederhosen shorts, a white ruffled shirt with red embroidery and a hat with a foot-tall bird feather sticking straight up, now touching the door frame. The only thing missing was one of those twenty-foot horns used in a cough drop commercial.
"Chad? We didn't recognize you!" The man standing before us looked more like a waiter at a Schnitzel house than a member of the "Memphis Mafia."
"This is my work uniform for the restaurant," Chad said proudly. "We all dress like this. I'm in charge, so I get to wear this hat. The others have to wear smaller hats with smaller feathers. I'll just be a minute," he said as he ducked into the room in an effort to avoid knocking his hat off of his head. "I wanted to say hi in person."
Chad headed for a small table located in the corner of the room. His leather lederhosen creaked as he sat down. "I needed to see if you two are as stunning as I remembered. And I can see that you are! You've both obviously got what I call the Güttenta Factor." He bent his elbow and like Jack Nicholson in the movie Easy Rider, made a "yip yip" noise as he flapped his pretend wing.
"Thank you," we said in unison, as twins do. We didn't know what the Güttenta Factor meant exactly, but from Chad's behavior we figured this must be a good thing.
"Elvis likes attractive women." Chad said as his eyes darted back and forth between our identical twin navels.
"Who doesn't?" I said. We all laughed.
Chad cleared his throat and began to talk incessantly. He would ask a question, not wait for the answer and continue rambling. We couldn't get a word in edgewise. This was turning into a group therapy session except that Chad was talking and we were listening. The "group" didn't get to participate. Finally, Chad launched into a soliloquy about Elvis, one he'd obviously repeated again and again over the years.
"Everyone is my friend because of my friendship with Elvis," Chad whined. "Nobody likes me for me. People use me all the time. I'm sick and tired of people asking me to do them the favor of introducing them to Elvis."
"You don't have to introduce us to Elvis," I said. Terrie kicked me with the side of her foot. "But then again-"
"Oh, don't worry. I'll introduce you to Elvis--that is, if he doesn't have any other plans."
"Um, just how well do you know Elvis?" Terrie asked.
"Well, let's just say Elvis doesn't make a move without me."
"Then you must know Colonel Parker." (Everyone knew that Colonel Parker had managed Elvis from the beginning of his career.)
"Who's Colonel Parker?" Chad asked, as his brows furrowed.
"You don't know who Colonel Parker is?" I asked. I was in shock. I couldn't believe what we were hearing.
"I know a Fess Parker. He was an actor who used to play Davy Crockett on TV."
Terrie and I looked at each other. This man was beginning to scare us.
"Just kidding," Chad said. "Of course I know the Colonel. I had chicken there the other day." Chad said this with a straight face.
Now we were starting to panic. Either Chad had a really bad sense of humor, or we were in danger, alone with him in our hotel room.
Chad smiled and laughed to himself, then asked, "Wanna know a secret?" Without waiting for us to respond he continued, "Elvis and the guys have this signal we make to each other if someone is full of 'bull'." He then made a gesture like snow falling, wiggling his fingers as he brought his hands down.
"Interesting," we said as we nodded our heads. Terrie piped in, "We heard Elvis buys his friends white Cadillacs. Has he ever bought YOU one?"
"Has he? Elvis has bought me two Cadillacs--er, uh, and the Volkswagen bus I'm driving now!"
By now we were really shaken. Who was this stranger we allowed into our hotel room?
Chad then gave a big sigh and said, "Well, gotta go. See you at 7:00 p.m." As he walked out his hand clutched a gold necklace with a lightning bolt at his neck, he paused as if he was about to explain its' meaning, then decided not to. He instinctively ducked to clear his feathered hat through the door. Chad talked and laughed to himself as he disappeared down the hall.
Later in the Jacuzzi, our conversation revolved around Chad's ridiculous outfit and his strange behavior. Chad didn't know who Colonel Parker was? And Elvis bought Chad a VW bus? By now we were thinking Chad could be crazy. What if Chad was a serial killer? We couldn't believe Elvis would choose to be around this man for more than five minutes, much less have him as a personal pal.
We decided Chad wasn't the sharpest knife in the Ginsu blade collection. What had we gotten ourselves into? What were we doing? What if we met Chad tonight and he drove us off into the desert? Goodness knows what could happen!
By the time we were finished with our Jacuzzi, we had worked ourselves up into a paranoid frenzy, as twins do. We decided to take control of the situation. We called the Swiss Hut Haus restaurant and cancelled our reservation.
That evening we ordered dinner from room service and congratulated ourselves for holding firm and not getting involved with this strange person who pushed his way into our lives.
Just as we were enjoying our caramel-crusted flan and watching Elvis on TV in the movie, Follow That Dream, there was a knock on the door.
"Who is it?" Terrie called out.
"It's me, Chad! I'm here to take you to meet Elvis!"
We looked at each other, rolled our eyes in unison and made that hand gesture to each other with the snow falling--the one that Chad said that he and Elvis and the guys do when someone is full of "bull."
"We're busy, Chad. Maybe another time," I said, as I turned the sound down on the Elvis movie.
"You don't understand. I told Elvis all about you. He's looking forward to meeting the beautiful Hollywood twins!"
"We're flattered, but we don't want to meet Elvis anymore."
"C'mon! Open the door!" Chad pleaded as he kicked at the door. "Elvis' driver is waiting with the limo downstairs."
"Don't get your lederhosen in a twist. We're just not up for a night with Elvis."
"What? I made special arrangements. Elvis is waiting for you now!"
"Uh, right, Chad. We'll take a rain check."
"But Elvis is leaving on Friday."
"Uh huh." We looked at each other, convinced we had made the right decision. God knows where this fruitcake would take us. "We'll meet Elvis another time, Chad." we winked at each other.
"Another time? Elvis is waiting for you NOW! He has a beautiful home not far from here."
"Right, we bet it's real nice."
"Elvis is expecting you. He has dinner ready. Maybe he'll serve his favorite, a Fool's Gold Loaf sandwich. It consists of a loaf of bread, a jar of peanut butter, a jar of jelly and lots of bacon!"
"Sounds good," Jennie said, as she stuck her tongue out and crinkled her nose. She then whispered, "Not."
I called out, "Too bad, we just ate."
"Open up, dammit! You're making a big mistake!"
"Look, mister. If you don't leave right now, we're calling the police," I said.
"Yeah," I whispered to Jennie, "The fashion police." We both giggled.
Chad's pleas and pounding on our door suddenly stopped.
We heard Chad walking down the hallway, mumbling to himself.
We sat down and tried in vain to concentrate on the Elvis movie. What if Chad comes back? we thought. We'd better get out of here. We quickly packed our bags and checked out of the hotel.
During the entire ride home to Los Angeles we congratulated each other.
"I'm proud of you for telling that guy off," I said to Jennie.
"No, you're the one," Jennie smiled. "You put him in his place!"
"Yeah, we sure told him!"
"He's not going to take advantage of US!"
"You're right about that. He'll think twice next time he pretends to be someone he's not."
"We're getting smarter and smarter!"
We patted each other on our backs all the way home to Los Angeles.
Shortly after this incident, I attended an Elvis Presley concert and sat third row center, up close and personal. I was enjoying the incredible performance--that famous one where Elvis is overweight and perspiring. What a show! For some unknown reason, my eyes drifted to the left side of the stage and there, standing in the wings, clear as day, with an orange backstage pass hanging from his neck, rocking out to the King's version of "Hunka, Hunka Burnin' Love", stood Chad.
Within a year, Elvis passed away from a heart attack at his home in Graceland on August 16th, 1977, at the age of forty-two! When Elvis died, we mourned along with the rest of the country. What an entertainer! What a super human! What jerks we were to have passed up such a golden opportunity.
We found out later that Elvis had an insatiable appetite for women. WHAT IF we'd gone to his house that evening? WHAT IF Elvis had wanted us to make love with him? WHAT IF... ? Whatever Elvis had in mind for us that night, most certainly, beyond a doubt, would have been a better ending to this story.
HOLLYWOOD LIFE LESSON: Don't rush to judgment when someone shows up at your door, claiming to know Elvis Presley, wearing leather lederhosen and a feathered hat.
Terrie Frankel is a writer and song writer. She is a New York Time best seller author ("Tells From the Casting Couch") and has written many songs. Her latest project is a film titled "Room Enough For Two - The Life of Dorothy Parker." It has recently been submitted to a few Film Festivals and she awaits their decision. She is a member of the Producers Guild of America, Grammys, and ASCAP to mention a few. You can visit her Dorothy Parker one woman musical website at http://www.dorothyparkermusical.com/. Terrie wrote all the music for the production and sings most of the songs. Terrie's favorite songs from the film is "Room Enough For Two" and "Fashionably Black List" (the later song being about Dorothy Parker's blacklist experience from her Hollywood screenwriting career due to the McCarthy hearings). She is currently working on her next book "Kiss Kiss Tell Tell" which should be completed shortly.
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